No Words

I am having the most difficult time expressing myself this week. Two blog posts not quite finished...and I am uncertain whether I even want to finish them. I feel as though I have run out of words. Perhaps it is not as dramatic as all that, though...maybe I just lost the "burr under my saddle" that had me writing those two particular posts. I was quite put out at the time, and though I am still somewhat aggravated in the same manner, I seem to be ignoring the effects somehow or another.

I went to get my hair trimmed during lunch today (Friday since I am posting this two days after I started it)...but came out several inches shorter, LOL! I stepped in the door and just could not help myself. It was so cute last year when Robyn cut it - my head felt cooler, lighter...I felt sexier. When you are nearing 30 and still single, sexier is better, LOL! Someone told me this morning I looked like a college student - which is not so much a bad thing, but it puts a little fear inside that maybe I look too childish or something. I do not know that that would be good, but then I am not very smart when it comes to men and what they are attracted to...anyway. All that to say, my hair is short again. It was spontaneous. Very, very spontaneous.

Part of the source of my aggravation is that there is something I want waiting just beyond my grasp...except that getting it includes falling into multiple snares that I vowed would never trap me. The problem is that I am having the hardest time fighting the temptation. I never imagined being so sorely tempted. It is definitely beyond my ability to resist on my own. For a time now, I have not been resisting as well as I should and it has shamed me. God, please forgive me! Heaven forbid I become so vain as to think I can resist such temptation in my own strength! I am seeing first-hand just how weak I am. It is an humbling experience. I just pray it is an experience I will conquer and learn from.